Discussing how the Pandemic affects the future of OCD

Artwork by Miroslava Chrienova

When the nation started really taking the whole COVID-19 thing seriously, it was the most surreal thing for me to witness, especially as someone who is already so highly conscious of how I interact with the outside world. I kept telling others that it was suddenly sort of like everyone else also had OCD now. Before, the average American would see me meticulously wiping down the handle of my shopping cart and probably raise an eyebrow. I remember wearing a mask to work a couple of times because I was feeling extra anxious during a particularly heavy flu season and everyone there thought I had Ebola or Smallpox or something. Now, you're literally not allowed to enter that very same store and many more like it without wearing face protection. When you even see people disinfecting their disinfectant, it's safe to assume society has flipped over in these last several months. I for one, am happy to see a majority of the public acting more cautious and taking extra safety measures. I hope it stays like that because it makes me feel a lot safer. But, as much as I just want to look at the silver linings, there are plenty of concerns I have about the future.

My particular category of OCD deals with a "fear of food" if you want to put it that way. But, it's still classified under the "Contamination OCD" strain. Germs or anything that can affect my health is still very much in play for me. My story with managing this constant torture through medication has been a rocky one, but before the new year began, I finally settled on one that kept my intrusive thoughts down to a minimum. It was a blessing to be honest. I was functioning almost perfectly fine until the sh*t hit the fan. Everyone was panic buying, making rash decisions, and just straight up acting like the apocalypse was upon us. It was frustrating because I finally felt like I could be a normal member of my social environment that DID NOT panic every second over everything. But suddenly, I was the copacetic one and everyone around me was panicking. I fought as hard as I could for awhile to not buy into the fear, but it's been everywhere. I was living in internal fear for the longest, but now I was living in external fear. You'd think I'd have it figured out, but I was already susceptible to all of it with my disorder just recently being only somewhat reined in.

2020 has been difficult to say the least, but I can find solace in the fact that I've had plenty of practice over the years. We had plenty of Clorox wipes and Dial hand soap already, which helped us last a little longer through the stock shortage. I'm no stranger to being overly prepared. When someone comes to me with a newly harbored anxiety about the pandemic, I can't help but think "welcome to hell dude, I've built a nice home here." But, that's clearly not the right thing to do. I want to be there for them, because I understand a lot of it. People are exhausted from paying so much attention, and I sure as heck know the feeling, especially when there's no break in sight.

After all of this, I still can't help but wonder what this means the future of OCD and its community. Will the societal preconception of OCD finally start to change from being nice, neat, and orderly? Probably not. But, once the pandemic passes, how many will develop the condition as a result of the trauma they experienced and emotional weight they placed on themselves? Definitely some. Others will jokingly say they have it, or at least, used to have it until it miraculously went away because that's totally how it works. I truly feel for people who already have been diagnosed and been through the wringer a few times. Which leads me to ask: How many people that ALREADY have OCD will pick up further obsessive compulsive behavior as a result of such high levels of fear? How many will spiral further down into even more unhealthy practices? Reading some of the forums dedicated to the disorder that I frequent, I've seen plenty of people getting worse by the day and succumbing to the panic that they already try so hard to fight on the daily. It's upsetting and depressing to witness.

I can't stress enough how uplifting it is to see OCD communities come together during these tough times and be there for one another. Keep in mind that many types of OCD apart from contamination and washing will be impacted outside of this, and we can't forget about them, too. Even if the chaos outside doesn't affect someone, the isolation and extra time alone with their thoughts can. That really goes for all forms of mental health. As for family members and friends, be there for your affected loved ones and ask what you can do to help. Be transparent and honest with one another about your feelings. Or, at the very least, educate yourself about the disorder and don't do anything stupid out in public. And, for f*cks sake, please don't self-diagnose. Go see a doctor if you feel you are developing irrational thoughts and are truly suffering from what your own brain does to you. It's extremely belittling to someone who actually has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. It's one thing to be particular, but it's another to let it irrationally consume you to the point that it takes over your life.

A return to "normal life," so to speak will likely come with enough time. At least maybe now, wearing a mask in public, wiping down a shopping cart, applying excessive hand sanitizer, and any other health conscious behavior won't be looked upon as being too weird or abnormal. Society could use a little less judgement anyways. Who knows? Maybe some of these precautionary practices being implemented in settings across the world will stick around. You might have even heard about this being the "death of the handshake," which could also be a nice change. Maybe those cool bathroom doors with the handle you can open with just your foot that help prevent the spread of door knobs will become more prevalent. I'm being overly optimistic here, but hopefully the pandemic will at least function as a teaching moment in open-mindedness, awareness, and how millions perceive one another. These will all come as benefits to people who suffer from illnesses like Obsessive Compulsive Disorder by possibly giving them one less thing to dread. I know, I know. Call me idealistic. I'm sorry. What can I say? I'm off that Serotonin. The pandemic brings both good and bad things to mental health as a whole. At least we can all agree that for better or for worse, the public will never look at health the same.